Ok, so I won't lie. I cried all the way to work this morning thinking I should be in Anderson township searching for the little 3 year old autistic boy who went missing, rather than going to work.
real tears
Then after not wanting to be at work, and yesterday being a cranky day... today continued that way, until I went overboard and was angry, mean and inappropriate during a meeting. When I got called out on it. I cried.
real tears
Fifteen years ago, I as the girl who "lived life to the fullest and had no regrets" and I was damn proud of it. And now, I, and most of the people I know, aren't happy with not just something, not just a couple things, but MOST of the very important things in our lives. Why is that? Why do we let ourselves do this and feel this way and become these people we don't want to be? And why can't we find a way out? And why can't we just stop habits we don't like and start one we want to start?
Why do I, more than anything in the world, hate review time at work? I am good at what I do - really good, actually. Since when do my people skills suck? Why am I more nervous about any negative stuff or "improve ons" more than I am content with my successes? It's unhealthy. I need a shrink. No offense doc, but the couch and stuff might actually all be necessary at this point. The virtual venue may no longer be working.. ya think?
About Me
- cmeddie
- I'm a simple TOMGIRL with the brains to back up her sarcasm (Or at least I think so, despite what you may think from reading this crap!) ;-) I love anything and everything, really. Some appreciate this as diversity, but I'd like to think of it as leveraging both sides of my brain equally. (Really I just wanted to fit "leverage" into a sentance outside of work.)
7 comments:
hey, you know where she lives, she has a couch, a fake degree....go pay her a REAL visit. Chin up teiner, it only gets better from here....right?
It's just life beatin' on you, making you question things you always thought to be true. Believe in yourself, we luv ya!
Call my secretary & set up an appointment. I'll even discount your rate.
I feel ya.... But you have to consider a couple things:
The person you were 15 years ago was 13 years old. The person you thought you would be when you're 13 hopefully would be different than who you are now. I mean, do you value anything you had when you were 13 the same way? Our world view gets broader. We're confronted by responsibilities we couldn't fathom when we were teenagers. We begin to understand that compromise, at least to a degree, is necessary to get through. Having said all that, that process, once initiated, will carry us through the rest of our lives. Adulthood is that process of being as authentic to our true selves as possible, in a way that will not get us killed by our friends and coworkers. People say that adolescence is hard, but I think that your mid-20s sucks too -- we're figuring out that balance between what we have been, and where we would like to go, and what We Really Want. And how to make peace with the rest of the stuff.
...And if it's something you can't make peace with, it's never too late to change. You've got to be willing to let yourself have time to figure out what it is you're after. And once you do figure it out, just go for it! Even if it sounds really crazy, or impractical, or if all of your friends tell you that it's a wierd idea. Because YOU are the "live life to the fullest" girl!
That will be $150. Thank youuuuuu!
Wow.. I feel the love. thanks. I went out tonight and drank and laughed. i feel MUCH better! ;)
That is after I decided to leave work mid-day because I couldnt handle it any more!
Good times.. Good times.
Thanks for the motivation and support. Someday I'll figure out what that crazy 13 year old meant.
Actually, drinking is a much more practical -- and cheaper -- way to deal with identity issues. You're a very resourceful girl.
Way to go tina....thats EXACTLY how i would have handled the situation. Well done
Hey this is Tina. Hey Tina!!! Sounds like you just needed to unwind. Drinking might not have been the answer though because with all the tears and emotions, it sounds like you're pregnant. Just kidding, keep your chin up.
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